besspeacetime: (Dorothy Parker Error)
I am trying to break the habit of putting "lol" after everything.

Here's the thing, there's a joke you will sometimes hear, that unless we giggle after we talk men think we are serious. So some of us get in the habit of using "lol" to replace the giggle when using the interwebs tubes to let boys know we are joking...I don't know why boys say "lol", cause they always assume their jokes are hilarious. Maybe that's why they do it?

But last night I had an epiphany in the vein of "fuck em if they can't take a joke."

so from now on "fuck em if they can't figure out it's a joke." no more girlie giggles after.

Now I am not saying this lol addiction was in direct response to any particular man I know, just that some women get wired to self deprecate their own sense of humor by putting a "it was a joke" tick at the end cause we think we need to explain or apologize for being sarcastic, wry, witty or humorous.

WELL I am through. no more knee jerk "lol" for me... no more "j/k", no more "joking" no more "<---sarcasm"

From now on I will only tell some one it was meant as a joke if they really express to me that they think I was serious and I have offended them unintentionally (I will do this by telling them "Lighten up dumbass... it was a joke")

I will only net-laugh at others' jackanapes* by typing "hee hee" or "Ha ha" or "MUHAHAHHAHAHAHAH" as needed.

Since I do have a bit of a sarcastic bent I will continue to tell people if I am being sincere when something sounded sarcastic, but from now on can that not lead to a 3 hour conversation where I have to convince you of my sincerity? 'Cause that would be great.

I have never told anyone I was being sincere and not been sincere in my sincerity, and I never will. So if I tell you I am not being sarcastic, know that I speak truth and leave it at that.

Now it might take me a while to break this bad habit, so bear with me.



*yah, I said it. I said "Jackanapes" you got a problem with that?
besspeacetime: (Too Much Coffee)
I was looking for some things for visual impairment

( the curiosity of whether or not certain gadgets existed, specifically for this instance a pair of 3d glasses that would work for me in the 3d movie theatre better than the skull slicers I have to wear with my contacts in and the MASSIVE over the glasses pair that block my peripheral vision and don't really work over my glasses at all... sidenote: I am very squinky about having my peripheral vision blocked by the frames on glasses I prefer wire frames for this reason and can't wear sunglasses (when I have my contacts in) that block my side view no matter how cute they are)

And I came across an ad for a site called gifts something or other that promised to find me low prices on "visually impaired adults"

which I am blaming on poor fuzzy logic and not some nefarious sex slavery scheme involving the barter of visually impaired humans.

So my brain once again was turned to the area of advertising fail.

luckily right then, there was one of MANY racist McDonald's ads on TV, followed by eric clapton trying to sell me a cell phone, followed by an ad for a Grey Hair covering for men, which made clear use of the "Hippies fear aging" mantra. so this got me thinking about one thing I dislike bitterly,

I dislike being advertised at. I don't like it when we visit my parents and the weekday casino music is all clearly for the retirees that live in the area and go to the casinos during the week and then it turns into the best of the 80-90's MTV mix on the weekends.

I don't like it when songs I felt a deep emotional teenage angst (in as much as I ever had teen angst) connection to, whilst talking about the wrongs and the rights of everything, back when we knew it all and were 18, late at night searching for those golden moments with our best friends,

and now that song would like me to buy a new car.

or a hershey bar.

the other aspect of this (which harkens back to rants of yore dealing with the "fear" in advertising) is the start of the new year favorite "advertising at"'s of new year's resolutions and Valentine's day LOSE WEIGHT and FIND FUCKBUDDY. You have apparently somehow failed at life if you don't lose 120 pounds in three weeks with nutri-jenny-watchers or harden your core with 24 hour-flex-gold's or found your perfect, scientifically proven, mate for life with e-match-chemistry.com by valentines day.

also if you haven't bought your skinny, hardened core, loved one the perfect gift comprised of expensive jewelry, a gross of roses, and mail order pajamas* you have failed and must now go live in a cave and try again next year.

The thing is at some point you are trying too hard. Now, I know if I go to that website, they aren't actually gonna try to sell me a visually impaired person, at least, I hope not, and I refuse to look. But the fact that they let the throttle go so wide on their fuzzy logic for the search that it would offer me this service/product worries me greatly.

Plus, where's the truth in advertising laws...what if I want to buy a visually impaired person? I see that link and think

"Oh cool...finally the perfect thing for christmas!" and follow that link only to find they do not, in fact, sell what they were advertising.

Earlier the same business also told me they had "swing arm lamp clamp replacements" and I doubted that as well, but there's an instance of something that is a legally purchasable product, which I am sure they do not sell. So there's false advertising.

um... anyway... that sort of endeth the rant. we now return you to your regularly scheduled ads.


Oh wait one more thing... I do not need to see ED product ads starring people who are old enough to be my parents. Thanks.


Unsettling thought View at your own risk )

*( hint for the guys; no girl wants you to get her mail order pajamas... it implies you are dealing with a bulk order situation. and bonus tip... Russell Stover chocolates suck, stop buying them for us. they contain no actual chocolate)
besspeacetime: (Hipster Art Doofus Zippo)
On the subject of watercolors art babble ahead )

anyway that's it for the art babble.
besspeacetime: (Dorothy Parker Error)
I wanted to say a few things about art, and I have been kicking over these concepts in my head for a while, I am taking the time to jot them down. Feel free to skip if you are not interested, I just want to get this written out.

Why art shouldn't ever make you feel stupid.


There are several kinds of art, some I love others I feel are lazy, some I feel are pretentious, at any time different schools and disciplines become trendy.

I want to talk about a few of them, in the context of communication.

"modern" art;

This would be the squiggles and blobs and splashes of paint OR geometric forms painstakingly aligned, colored according to a theory or taste to evoke or communicate certain vague feelings. Some of these are styles that work to get a feeling across to the viewer, some of them only engender dismissal on the basis that the painter clearly is incapable of doing anything other than wasting paint. Or a feeling that you or your 4 year-old could do better. The truly significant art in this style still gets you to say "How did s/he do that?" not "What a bunch of crap! I could do that!"

Both styles will sell; the first because there are strokes of genius and a clear communication from artist to viewer (they get their point across, or make you want to look and examine the piece to find new treasures of feelings), the second because through some fluke of "critique" or commission driven snake oil salesmanship, the artist becomes a Hot Buy and you are made to feel stupid if you don't "get it" or buy it.

Here's a tip: If you don't get it, its because there's nothing there for you to get.

To purchase a piece of art that doesn't speak to you is stupid. If someone else "gets it" I mean it really actually spoke to them, not that they are too embarrassed to admit they bought crap based on pressure from a salesman, all this says about you is that there was nothing in that piece for you. You aren't stupid or culturally void, or lacking taste. You just aren't a sheep with an empty wallet and a piece of what you really see as crap on your wall, that you will grow to resent the purchase of.

A true Master in this style will be able to evoke some communication of feeling or concept in everyone who views the piece.

impressionism

Impressionism is meant to evoke a feeling specific to the common experiences around us every day.

Everyone can remember a sweet and refreshing breeze through a field on a summer day. Or a candlelit evening dance or a spring rain in a garden. Rather than trying to hit a realistic depiction of these things Impressionist strive to get you to remember the feeling... the feeling of dancing, the peaceful sigh in your soul from the breeze, the sparkling clean of the rain.

Its about a the movement, the light, the art of a gesture or the tricks of the wind. The feeling of just now... the recording of the golden moment. "Right here at this point, is the Epitome of this experience"
It doesn't get more itself than this moment, this light, this movement. This says it all.

Its very hard to look at a master of impressionisms' work and not feel what they were trying to communicate. The images are so perfectly a record of that golden moment, that even if we've never been in a candlelit nightclub in Paris, or at a pond of water lilies, we can still "feel" it, based on our own golden moments.

realism

There are two types of realism that I will discuss here, there is the realism where the settings and figures are clearly defined, anyone can look at it and say "There is a guy standing in the rain" It may not be a scene that ever actually happened or a real person, but the guy is definitely there and it is definitely raining.

Then there is Photorealism, an exact and painstaking reproduction of a real thing or person or place. Every detail perfectly recorded.

Realism in general is the artist saying "There is this and I think its art so I am going to paint it to communicate to others why this moment and set of objects/people is beautiful to me." The artist takes liberties with color, shapes etc. to accentuate or play down certain aspects of the image to direct the viewer to the things about the subject that matter to the artist.

Photorealism is usually "This is here and this is what it looks like" The artist takes no liberties with form or color, recording a historical object or person for posterity usually falls in this category. Photorealism is purely letting the subject speak for itself with very little of the artist added in.




Now, the point of this is all to communicate.

The artist is saying "This is how I feel" or "Remember how this feels?" or "This satisfies something in me and here's why."

The human brain is set up to read symbols, its how you are reading this, we are hardwired to learn a language of symbolism. These little pictures that I am stringing together make sense to you as words because you were taught English. if you speak a different language you might not understand the writing, but you recognize it as writing, you know that there is something being communicated here, even if you can't see the meaning or follow the string of little pictures. If you boil this hardwiring down to the very base ability, it is the ability to see a symbol and know its meaning. and we are born already understanding the language of symbols to some extent.

for instance take this, Happy Its a smile face. A circle two dots and a curved line. It looks nothing like a human face really. If you saw someone who looked like that really, you'd run screaming in the opposite direction. But drawn on the sidewalk in chalk, you see it as you pass by all the people in the world who don't actually look like this, and your brain goes "Ping! Happy Face! YAY!"

Or you see a thick brown line with a green oval Perched on top Tree and your brain goes "Ping! Tree!" But trees don't actually look like that. But you see this symbol for tree and you can know that the tree is what is being communicated. But, by the same token you don't go outside and see a maple and go "What the heck is that? It looks nothing like that symbol!" So everyone has it in them to recognize the simple symbol and the complex data of the reality and put them both into the same category. They are both "Tree".

So because of this, most people are comfortable with art that falls somewhere in the range of "Stick figure" to "Wyeth Portrait". If you ask the viewer to leave that comfort zone, you are challenging their ability to recognize symbols...which since it is a basic wiring, is saying "You are wired wrong if you can't see that these three blobs of orange paint are a parrot and six naked women" or "This fluffy pink blob speaks of eternal angst and if you can't see that you lack the finer feelings and a soul" when in fact the artist is at fault for failing to get across the communication on a human level.

The end, now leave me alone, I'm painting.
besspeacetime: (Dorothy Parker Error)
First off, Who didn't see this coming?


Second... Let's take a few minutes to think like a newspaper! It'll be fun!

Let's see, we have this product that we historically charge the consumer very little for, preferring to make our revenue from ads. I know let's put it on the internet for free to the consumer, and still try and make money off ads.

The only difference is People will have to click on the ads for us to make money.

Only looking at these ads won't result in anything positive for the consumer, Like coupons or anything.

And also people don't normally like to navigate away from their chosen page to look at ads,

and some of our older consumers are afraid to click on the ads in case they get a virus or their Identity stolen (a story about Identity theft through computer ads is on the first page of the tech section btw.)

But eventually, everyone will get their news online because they won't have to deal with our annoying subscription people, the delivery people, or the recycling of the paper. we cannot fail to make money off this from advertisers!

Okay well... sure the classifieds aren't going so well... there's a lot of sites out there that do it better, and the one that does it best, does it for free, so we are gonna lose that revenue too I guess.


And the Bridal Announcements... well people are just starting to assume that part of the cost of the wedding is hosting and domain registration for a personal page announcing their upcoming nuptials...and websites that offer bridal page services are getting revenue from click through ads and fees to the couple...


Well we'll have to cut some corners... I know... we'll just reprint stories from the wire services... no one will notice that it's the same as everyone else's story on this, or that you can skip the middleman and get it from the same wire service we got it from. Sure we will miss a lot of detail a story that was thoroughly investigated would have, and pretty much there's no follow thru on what happened next to any of these stories, so if people come back hoping for more detail the next day they'll be S.O.L.

That'll keep them coming back!


****

Not even gonna go into the fact that when they do re-write (regurgitate) the wire stories they are often un-edited for content and typos, "The 12 inch waves of the typhoon"..." the Masseuse who raped a woman", "The need to "Attrack" buyers", all my favorite recent errors.

also the cries of "Hey people don't read anymore that's why we are losing money!"

Really?... Last time I checked the forums on your website were busy... people are reading the news on your site, and commenting on it...for free.

"Well Magazines aren't going under!"

Magazines are a monthly purchase and their websites have very little free content past a preview of the next issue. If you want more content most magazines require you subscribe to the print edition for access to more on line content.
a business model your reporting skills are no longer up to "attracking" the consumers for.

I feel bad that people are gonna be out of work from this... but really... you shot yourselves in the foot.

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